POST SCRIPT

cycleIf I write a post for the blog or do some kind of art, I feel I have earned my keep for the day. There is a feeling of satisfaction, of duty done, of requirements fulfilled. On the other hand, when I don’t write or do art, I feel adrift, without purpose. The day seems shallow and pale.

Since February I have been in a painting cycle when art predominates. These periods usually last from six to eight weeks. At the beginning the brush feels clumsy in my hand, the paper is stubborn and the ink indifferent. What is most important at this early stage is to persevere which often means making sloppy, inarticulate pictures and wasting some good paper. It is almost a sacrificial ceremony or rite of passage.

After a day or two or three, the ink and water become more tractable, the paper receptive and the brush responsive. Then the real painting begins and usually continues for several weeks. Of the 50+ pictures produced perhaps five or six are good and I am satisfied.

The third phase of the work is the winding down process which is where I am now. I will have the desire to paint and create but the well is running dry. Slowly the brush starts to falter, the ink to smear and the paper to become cold and isolated. I know it is time to stop but I am reluctant to leave the creative high. I am reluctant to feel I am not earning my keep and so I turn to writing.

All of the words that have been left simmering on the back burners start to heat up and spill over and sputter on the grill of my mind. And so for the next month or two, I will use words rather than images to communicate. One medium is not better than another, one is not easier.

It is in this period before the new cycle takes hold that I am restless and unfocused. While I wait for the words to arrive, I think of a poem I wrote many years ago when I was just learning how to listen to the voice.

AB POSITIVE

I opened a vein
this morning
and bled a poem
all over this clean white sheet
staining it a rich burgundy.

Hot tears
will not remove it
but you can
try ice.

MULTIMEDIA! ME?

I can’t believe I have uploaded a video on You Tube!!! I am so not technical but necessity forced me to hunker down and figure out the MS Movie program and then You Tube. Holy cow! what next??? See my art blog for more info at http://MarieTaylorArt.wordpress.com.

Now that I’ve taken this first baby step in multi-media, I must admit to dreams of future grandeur.  Here’s the link-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sSpgJ-PKNfU&feature=youtu.be

WHAT IS ENOUGH?

(This post is also found on the art blog)

The other night I went with a friend to hear a (relatively) well-known potter talk about her work. She was exceptionally articulate about her process and vision and the small audience was very receptive.

Pottery/ceramics is one of the oldest art forms and the kiln is the tool of alchemical transformation changing what was once malleable earth into something solid and lasting. But I am not a big fan of some of the modern ceramic designs in which, to my mind, the spiritual and the beautiful has been replaced with gravity-defying cleverness or Dali-esque images.

This potter’s art pieces are massive and earthy; they are noted for their size/volume/weight and intricacy of design. There are tubes, ‘worms’, extrusions, pots, balls, gourd shapes, etc. all piled, organically twisted and turned within each other and bound in one large ceramic hill. I am tempted to say that everything is included but the kitchen sink but there were some glimpses of that too. Stop! That’s enough!

At one point she said she found the medium of painting too limiting and how she feels forced to crash through barriers. After watching a lot of slides and hearing her presentation I felt her enthusiasm and passion for what she did – and I could see flashes of interest or beauty in some of the pieces – but they were still too ‘extravagant’ for me. I felt a super abundance, a feeding frenzy of ceramic creation that left me feeling stuffed and uneasy. There was too much of everything.

During the question period I asked her “if there was a problem in knowing when to stop.” How did she know when a piece was done? This is a question I face all the time. She held out an imaginary glass and said with great authority that just as she knew when the glass was full of water, she knew when a ‘sculpture’ was done.

I must admit I felt a little foolish in the face of her certainty and confidence. Later in the evening I thought to myself, she must know what she is talking about – after all, she is very well-known and successful. I poked around the edges of the question. Was my ego smarting because her answer implied that any experienced artist knew when to stop – and that by extension because I had asked such a fundamental question I was obviously not a good artist?

Then two responses came to my attention. What is one person’s ‘just enough’ may be another person’s ‘not enough’ or ‘too much.’ And secondly, due to the nature of her art form, she could add and subtract elements of her art piece as she pleased until she found the stopping place, a point of balance.

In contrast, with ink wash art, every stroke of the brush is a final one. It cannot be changed, moved or removed. It is permanent. The most that can be done is that it can be layered by more ink. There is a great finality in ink work, a no turning back momentum. If I go a step too far in painting something, it is ruined or spoiled.

So my question to the potter was an irrelevant one for her. While she seemed driven to include as much as she could, I am driven to remove as much as I can. I find the setting of limits frees me to concentrate. By eliminating some choices my mind is not constantly weighing and judging alternatives and I can focus my energy on what is essential.

Every activity has its built-in questions. Should I add more salt? Should I round off this edge of marble? Should I cut this material on the bias? There is always a point of no return, a need to commit to a certain path, a particular focus. There is always a jumping off point into the unknown which contributes to the exhilaration of all creative activity.

(For Marie Taylor Ink blog followers:  I posted some new art work this week under Art Talk on the art blog at http://MarieTaylorArt.wordpress.com)

ARS GRATIA ARTIS

Flower Garden

Flower Garden 5

A friend of mine who is an artist stopped painting last year after he realized he was repeating himself in terms of technique, subject matter and approach. A few weeks ago we visited a local museum together in an attempt to jump start his creative engine. It may be months before something clicks but it will click eventually. Meanwhile he suffers.

To follow a creative career is hard work, often painful and frequently not valued by the larger society. Few parents encourage their children to become poets, actors, dancers, painters or composers for they recognize that the arts do not often bring success, at least in material terms. For every rock star there are thousands of unknown garage bands. For every Picasso there are thousands – perhaps millions – of weekend painters.  It is true of all the arts.

So why do it? A creative person does what he or she does because it is more painful not to do it. In the beginning it really isn’t about fame or money or the thrill of execution; it is an undeniable hunger or longing that demands self-expression. And this self-expression comes at a price.

To access the creative realm, courage is need. Inhibitions must be set aside along with the fears of the ego, and the artist must embark on a journey that may lead to judgment, failure, ridicule, poverty, madness or even, worse, indifference. These are not unfounded concerns – just read the lives of the artists.

So why risk it? Because when the artist can open to the Creative, the small self is swept away – at least for a while. A new reality is experienced that is vital, raw, unlimited and filled with joy. It is a feeling that your real self has been found at last – a homecoming. There is nothing – except perhaps sexual intimacy or mystical revelation – that can approach it, and all three of these activities are related in that the small self is absent.

Luckily, this joy is not contingent on the quality of the work produced nor the ‘worthiness’ of the artist. It requires only the willingness to surrender the small self to the Creative Self.

When someone in a creative field starts adjusting his work to attract fame, money, recognition, satisfaction, pride, etc. the purity of the surrender is lost and with it, I believe, the source of originality and inspiration. When the artist listens to the demands of the market place rather than the voice of his inner nature he has effectively shut the door on his creative journey.

It is not easy to maintain this balance between selflessness and the self – and this is the great struggle of the artist. How long do you keep painting when you can’t make a living at it? How long do you keep going to auditions when you never get the starring role? How many rejection slips does it take to discourage a writer? How do you hold to your vision when your family is in need?

I don’t have any answers to these questions. They are unique and personal to each individual artist. Some people keep creating in spite of the odds; others commercialize their work; some give up and get a ‘real job’; some become teachers and hope to inspire others, while some wait for retirement from the everyday world.

Meanwhile, the creative journey continues in each of our lives and we can define our ‘art’ in our own personal terms. The art of engineering, of homemaking, of cleaning, of parenting, of computing – all are worthy vehicles ready to carry us along our individual paths to the Creative Self.

I have a new post on the art blog at http://MarieTaylorArt.wordpress.com.

 

 

MANDALAS

I added a new page to this website titled “Mandalas.” I have been drawing mandalas for many years and have a fuller explanation of the why and how of it as well as some examples on the new page. Thanks for indulging me in these little side trips.

NEW ART

Mountain Falls

I have added a second exhibition of past and recent art under the ZEN BRUSH ART GALLERY page. Thanks for your encouragement.

ZEN BRUSH

Tahoe

The last couple of weeks I have been delving back into art. It seems that I write and paint in spurts – three or four weeks of writing, then a month of art. One of the big disadvantages to this approach is the ramp-up time needed to get back into some kind of flow. It can take several days before I allow the brush to paint or the keys to write. It requires a setting aside of the desire for a specific outcome, and a willingness to withhold judgment.

Who am I to say this piece is good or bad? I never have a good perspective on the quality of what is produced. In fact, I usually do not ‘like’ any pictures I may be working on and it only after I have hung them on the wall for a day or two that any beauty shines through. It is almost as if the painting continues to evolve and change without my interference (or is it because of it?)– sort of like the shoemaker and the elves. I wake up in the morning and the work is done.

Heart Land

When I paint I take one of two approaches – I may be doing a study of someone else’s work and trying to interpret some aspect of it; or I approach the blank page with nothing in my mind as an exercise (I am tempted to say) of meditation. But it is not meditation in the usual sense for I do not have any picture or image in mind, nor do I usually have a desired outcome – say a picture of a flower. The mind space is diffused and unfocused.

Instead, I just play with the ink and water with the beginner’s mind – for I really know nothing about art. I have never taken any lessons, just read a bunch of how-to books for technique. But I bring to this process a great admiration for this type of communication with these particular tools.

Since I have no idea or image in mind, there is no way that I can make a mistake. This is very attractive to my ego and the means I use to subvert it. So I come to the drawing board like child playing in the mud and relax into the moment. When I find myself slipping into judgment or into analytical thinking I recognize that it is time to stop.

Drawing Closer

Anyway, after several years of painting solely with ink, I have begun to explore the voice of water colors. Here are some of the latest explorations into an abstract country.

 

 

 

 

 

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